2022

January

On the other side, Betty White ascended up the sky,
Kicked off a year of passings of the high profile kind,
‘16 was the warm-up, ‘22 said ‘hold my beer’,
Bob Saget, Meatloaf, Sid Poitier, Warnie and Gil Gottfried,
Rod Marsh, Estelle Harris, Andy Symonds, Ray Liotta,
Pages turning on the calendar, piling up with goners,
James Caan, Archie Roach, Judith Durham, ONJ and Pele,
Gorbachev, Shinzo Abe, Queen Lizzie’s passed away,
Dame Angie, Robbie Coltrane, Coolio, Twitch and Kirstie Alley,
Lord knows many missed, ink staying fresh on the obituaries,
Looks like covid’s here to stay, cases kicked off more than 30k,
Omnicron crowned the king, no longer just a passing thing,
Spare a thought for Charlise Mutten, you deserved better, Little Girl,
Peep at American Samoa, where that tsunami done unfurled,
Andy O’Keefe arrested once more, Novak banished from these shores,
Ash and Rafa crowned the champs, while in Ukraine brews a pending war.

February

Australia claimed the Ashes, Whoopi threw a massive fit,
Winter Olympics in Beijing, Zhu Yi, Eileen Gu and Chloe Kim,
Valieva felled by a doping test, Norway proved heads and shoulders above the rest,
Back home that Religious Discrimination Bill kicked off nationwide unrest,
Koalas deemed endangered, still reeling from the fires before ‘rona,
Guess who’s back? That’d be Jarryd, retrial for that motherfucker,
Then the contents bubbled over, a new nightmare been unleashed,
Russia done invaded Ukraine, will there be a World War 3?

March

Kyiv under fire, Russians bringing in the pain,
Can’t call it a surprise, Putin is both mad and vile,
But just when all seemed lost, that the blue and yellow would count the cost,
The Megalomaniac’s plans hit a snag, didn’t count on victims fighting back,
Meanwhile here at home, floods done stormed the east coast,
NSW and QLD copped a drenching, before you know it VIC is swimming,
Kim Kitching left the building, mean girls bore the brunt of the finger pointing,
Plane crash in China while back home an infant dubbed the youngest victim of ‘rona,
Ash called it a career, SA got a new premier,
The Oscars making headlines once more, The Slap Heard ‘Round The World made it so,
Cue mass cuck and simp jokes, ‘comedian’ now among the riskiest roles.

April

Will and Chris got the world tripping, back home at the Easter show another young life taken,
An election been announced, time to head to the polls,
While in New York a deranged fool shot up subway folks,
Didn’t fit the narrative, media couldn’t run with it,
While the best new show in Hollywood is playing, that of Johnny, Amber and their mudslinging,
The latter branded dirty in the sickest way, the former never should’ve been cancelled,
No real winners in this writer’s opinion, both were foul and quite repugnant.

May

Finally, belatedly, the first female main event in boxing,
Taylor beat Serrano, sure was fun and exciting,
Philippines has a new President, so much for those history lessons,
Voted in the son of the dictator, what the fuck were y’all thinking!?
Then there was that all-conquering organisation catering to folks of a certain tone,
Burned, Looted and Murdered their way to the fore, placed the mainstream in a chokehold,
Turned out they were lying and swindling, finessed many fools,
Sympathy in short supply to those that backed them over lies,
Shootings in Buffalo and Orange County, ‘Murica motherfuckers!
Sweden and Finland joining NATO, must be awkward for Putin’s supporters,
Australia has a new PM, ScoMo never stood a chance,
Another school shooting, this time in Uvalde, Texas, Yanks and guns an unholy alliance,
Johnny all but exonerated, woe to those that got him cancelled,
How do you like them apples, Amber? The shit stains linger forever.

June

Queen’s Platinum Jubilee, her last hurrah of sorts,
Australia qualifies for the big show, cheers to that Wiggles fan in goal,
Vivid back at last, inflation left its mark,
Upped that minimum wage but taxpayers be copping it hard,
Memo to Ms. Wilkinson, loose lips sink ships, way to jeopardise Britt’s case,
Now your job’s on life support while the case been delayed,
Earthquake in Afghanistan, Golden State crowned the champs,
Roe V Wade overturned, triggering Bedlam across the land.

July

Floods raging on the east coast, taking lives, taking homes,
BoJo called it quits, scandal after scandal left him in the skids,
Unrest in Sri Lanka, bullets shredded Shushou Abe,
Nick Kyrgios on a roll, Elon fumbled taking twitter,
Webb’s first deep field sure was something majestic,
Comm Games kicking off, Aussies burdened with expectations.

August

Comm games came and went, Australia won as expected,
Emma, Kyle and Cody, media spinning bullshit stories,
Earthquake in the Philippines, Pelosi in Taiwan,
CCP seeing red, in their eyes that’s disrespect,
Al-Quaeda took a hit, Al-Zawahiri bombed out,
Twenty years after 9/11, sweet revenge without a doubt
Paul Green checking out, Salman Rushdie hacked to ribbons,
Writers and comedians under threat, offended radicals sure are dangerous,
Cancel Culture came for Andrew Tate, ScoMo busted for power grabbing,
Whispering Jack has cancer, luckily ducked the grim reaper.

September

Chris Dawson found guilty, sure did take them long enough,
UK has a new PM, answered to the name Liz Truss,
Serena hangs her raquet, Fed will follow soon after,
Tragedy in Buxton, the driver being the lone survivor,
Queen of England passed away, ended that 70-year reign,
Hers are big shoes to be certain, King Charles awaiting coronation,
Black Little Mermaid, Mahsa Amini kicked off mass protests,
Word to first-world whingers, this is what it means to be oppressed,
Geelong beats Sydney, Optus hacker running rampant,
Italy has a new PM, female, conservative and right-leaning,
Storms in the Phillippines, happens damn near every year,
Hurricanes in Florida, TV coverage looking kinda biblical.

October

Panthers make it back to back, mass shooting in Thailand,
Medibank and Optus hacked, bigwigs felt their customers’ wrath,
Lidia Thorpe lost her post, that bikie boyfriend undisclosed,
Promised to bring fire and chaos, undone by her taste in blokes,
Liz Truss makes history but not for reasons flattering,
One month, over and out, shortest term in history,
Rishi Sunak the new PM, Kanye West done played himself,
While Down Under Cassius Turvey sadly met his end.

November

Halloween crush in South Korea, Brazilian general election,
Elon Musk bought twitter, chaos ensued shortly after,
Isis brides were brought home, Western Sydney feeling jacked,
They went abroad to side with killers, why in hell would they bring ‘em back?
US midterm election chaos, Donnie back for another round,
Embarrassed himself as usual, Trump ship once again ran aground,
Hackers turning up the heat, kicking off mass anxiety,
Black Panther Wakanda Forever, Chadwick Boseman sorely missed,
Poland bombed, turned out accidental, MH17 bombers guilty,
East coast still be floodin’, earthquake got Indonesia shakin’,
FIFA World Cup in Qatar, controversial from the start,
Danny Lim beaten up, coppers once again look like thugs,
ScoMo censured, Kanye drowning himself deeper,
Lockdown protests in China, talk about going backwards.

December

Chris Dawson gets 24, Higgins trial goes up in flames,
Australia lost to Argentina, Lionel Messi still got game,
Eruptions in Hawaii and Indonesia, more headaches for Donnie Trump,
Back at home the interest rates are still on the up and up,
Umar Patek released from jail, the ultimate act of disrespect,
Sex ban in Indonesia, Brittany Griner bailed from Russia,
Meg and Harry’s documentary, not-so-well-received, predictably,
So much for mending bridges, the final insult to the family,
Cop killers in Chincilla, A-League chaos in Victoria,
Spinach packets contaminated, even Popeye won’t be checkin’ it,
Argentina wins the World Cup, Lionel Messi dubbed the GOAT,
Civil unrest in Peru, Trump charged for riots at the Capitol,
Ruddy the US Ambassador, Penny Wong in China,
Zelenskyy rollin’ into DC, youth crimes in QLD,
Comanche won the yacht race, heatwaves in the east and south,
Warner’s double century, don’t ask ya boy what that’s about,
Twitter beef between Andrew and Greta before an arrest for the former,
Pele bade farewell, Viv Westwood and Barbara Walters, sure was a year of departures for the rich and influential.

That’s about the size of it, been quite the year, hasn’t it?
Great for some, a downer for others but that’s the way it goes regardless of the numbers on the calendar,
Everyone got different experiences but we’re all headed towards one destination,
Now we’re here, coming from multiple directions, it’s time to draft those resolutions,
Ensure it’s one you can commit to, even better if for life, take it one step at a time, baby steps and you’ll be alright,
Farewell, 2022, for better or worse it’s in the history books,
Bring on 2023, go and get yours, wish y’all the best, let’s see what awaits us ‘round the corner.

Postscript:

2012 I started this journey when the Mayans predicted that the world would crumble into memory,
Unaware that this was the first step to a whole new beginning, apprehensive at first but quickly hit the ground running,
While folks were wildin’ out on Gangnam Style and trying to track down that twisted warlord Kony,
Yours Truly was learning a new art that would change life’s trajectory, Pops was the catalyst but ultimately I’m the author of this story,
Nervous as hell in the beginning but damn near quickly felt some strange sense of belonging,
Days of being stateless coming to a warmly welcomed conclusion,
Doors flung open, suddenly, a bright new chapter written, never too long in the tooth for new experiences, the universe might be onto something.

Life been good in general but for the longest time felt distrustful and isolated,
Everyone got their demons born out of missteps or circumstances accidental or intentional though the world and others can and will add to it,
Once a young’un with a sunny disposition, had my moments but overall looking towards a bright future,
Years between 15 and 27 begat various tests of the mettle, good days and fond memories preventing total capitulation,
At first glance had it all but upstairs it was messy in the attic, fuck the world and all the phonies in it, the shadows is where I feel comfortable,
Then one day out the blue Pops decided he wanted to learn kung fu, gotta admit I was intrigued, for the first time ever wanted to go to school,
This fine art unlike any previously studied, required little of brute force and more that was focused and penetrating,
Relaxation is key, tall order for one accustomed to relying on strength,
Feeling like a fish out of water but overall welcomed the challenge,
Firm friendships an additional bonus, the lifelong drifter finally found a home,
Do I dare knock down these walls? Been up for so long they’re riddled with moss,
Fuck it, take a chance, let ‘em into your world, isolation seems absurd,
And so I permit ‘em, many more after that, so long as they’re decent, ‘twas a wise decision dare I say it,
2012 closed on a high, the world remained intact, but the Mayans weren’t off the mark,
Experienced a rebirth like I’d been brought to the light after years lingering in the dark.

That was the life for the next eight years, far from perfect to be sure,
Even under the warm sun perfection remains an illusion,
Old me would’ve handled it differently, stumbling and tripping en route to a messy victory,
Through ways bitter and manic rather than methods rooted in coolness and maturity,
Did this strange art play a part? The need for a relaxed state surely left its mark,
No hothead can master it, practicing then teaching it triggering opportunities for continual self-improvement,
Taming the beasts within gaslighting and mocking almost daily, the host body realizing, finally, that there’s good in almost everybody,
Friendships formed for the first time in years, some of ‘em becoming second fam,
Ten years earlier never would have conceived of it, script was flipped but for that I’m glad,
The positives extending to the daily grind, making bearable the morning and afternoon commute,
That nine-to-five damn near flew, the clock moves quicker when there’s something to look forward to,
Even in ’18 when the health went south, kept up the hustle ‘til the struggle escalated,
Can’t keep a good man down when he’s fuelled by hope and determination,
’19 came and went, felt like happy days were here to stay,
But what comes up must come down, damn cliché we must learn the hardest way.

World shut down by an all-conquering virus to kick off the 2020’s,
Whole world in lockdown to the detriment of businesses and economies,
Took its toll on everyone, peoples’ true forms revealed one by one,
Saw the very worst of humanity, different day but ever-widening divisions, waging war over differences, friendships once solid now they’re crumbling,
A return to the Academy looking less likely but still within the realm of plausibility,
Counting down the days mentally but overpowered by the bitterness of reality,
Being immuno-compromised in these strange times, living with folks vulnerable forcing one to be more cautious,
Stockdale Paradox came to life, will I be back in time for Christmas?
Two years later still adrift and floundering, another lesson in the folly of misguided optimism,
Finally snagged by the beast in mid ’22, for one week knocked out by an extreme flu,
Had me a dream that seemed so strange, jolted me awake and more or less sealed my fate,
It was time to move on, so ends the glorious spell, we can try and try but the story won’t always end well.

Out from the safe zone, walking on, alone,
Came full circle in unplanned ways, felt like the train been derailed,
Perhaps it’s for the better but somehow feels the opposite,
One of life’s harshest lessons came to life, that they’re never permanent, these fun times,
Pain and change are what keeps the wheels turning, can’t have one without the other,
Can’t cry over spilt milk, wipe that shit then move on forward,
Can’t lie, though, the demons are roosting, day by day the wrong layers are peeling,
Fading into the shadows, Scorpion’s MK9 victory pose, maybe this was my place all along,
Heart frosting, sun setting, colours fading, might as well be flat-lining,
Could have regressed to old ways had it not been for a silver lining,
Ain’t no reset back to day one, friends met along the way still here,
Interactions further and fewer in between but somehow the bond remains pristine,
Cheer up, Young Man, not all who wander are lost,
Something worthwhile might be ‘round the corner, hard to predict the future,
Some days wondering if I can even stomach it as long as we’re keeping it one hundred,
Might as well keep going while the heart’s still beating, didn’t get this far just to pack it in,
If pride is the sole motivator then so be it, go with the flow and resist overthinking,
Opportunities may pop up unexpected like the one previously encountered during the year that we were supposed to meet our makers according to those from an ancient civilisation,
It’s been quite a ride, just want to let y’all know that you’re appreciated,
Showed love to this jaded wanderer, eight years of memories and life lessons in equal measure,
Sing it loud like Elsa, gotta ‘let it go’, holding on for too long will rip those palms open,
Barely reached the midpoint, still plenty of chapters waiting to be written,
Once again, from the top, right fist, left palm and bow,
We’ll meet again someday, but it’s a fond farewell for now.