{"id":484,"date":"2020-04-30T09:03:49","date_gmt":"2020-04-30T09:03:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/musicalmemories.whereishome.info\/?p=484"},"modified":"2020-04-30T09:03:49","modified_gmt":"2020-04-30T09:03:49","slug":"then-and-now","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/musicalmemories.whereishome.info\/?p=484","title":{"rendered":"Then And Now"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I don\u2019t watch TV now as much as I did as a kid, during the years when The Simpsons <\/em>was still the best damn show on the tube, Ross and Rachel were trying to wrap their heads around what being \u2018on a break\u2019 meant and Kenny was meeting his maker in a variety of truly twisted ways but if there\u2019s one thing that I\u2019ve noticed on the rare occasion that I tune in now it\u2019s that the quality of TV ads seem to have plummeted faster than whatever credibility Ja Rule had left following the Fyre debacle. I hate to sound like an old-timer but back in my day TV ads were far more memorable and some even reached iconic status and quite frankly I don\u2019t see any of that happening with many of the commercials circulating on the airwaves lately.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No disrespect intended towards anyone. Save the hate mail for another day.<\/em> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Four ads from my youth and teenage years come to mind when I think about the most memorable TV commercials that I\u2019ve ever seen, the first being two old TV commercials for Tim Tams that made the rounds on TV during the 1990s. Back then, Tim Tam ads normally involved a muscular, dark-skinned male genie or magician summoning a pack of Tim Tams to satisfy their co-star\u2019s sweet tooth and if said co-star happens to be a woman he will usually share the chocolates with her in a rather seductive and intimate manner. Woe be to her significant other if she happened to have one because that poor guy is usually made to be some type of sacrificial lamb, hilariously vanquished at the woman\u2019s request before she and that hot, strong hunk of burning love (I can\u2019t believe I wrote that!) are free to share the biscuits together. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A hunky black male in\na rather sensual and provocative advertisement for chocolate? Geez! No points\nfor guessing for which audience those ads were geared towards.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The first ad involved a young couple sharing a pack of Tim Tams together and stumbling upon a genie\u2019s lamp that is rubbed by the man, awakening a genie decked out in black robe and cap plus a gold neck chain and earrings, giving him the appearance of an African prince. The man immediately surmises that they are both entitled to three wishes and so he rather abruptly commands the genie to set him up on a date with 90s It Girl Kimberley Davies, prompting the genie to summon her from out of thin air. Kim then rudely snatches the last Tim Tam from the pack held by the girl, causing her to spitefully wish that she and her now ex-boyfriend \u2018take a hike\u2019 and so the genie instantly banishes them both. Now alone with the girl, and perhaps sensing that she will wish for his freedom the way Aladdin did for the genie at the end of the Disney film and then perhaps a date, the genie smiles as the girl prepares to make a third and final wish. Much to his chagrin, it is simply for a never-ending pack of Tim Tams. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Maybe next time, Bud. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The second Tim Tam ad was for Tim Tam Fingers, a thinner\nvariation of their famous chocolate biscuit \u2013 and one that would most likely be\nbanned if it was in circulation on TV screens today. In this ad a girl and a\nshirtless and muscular magician are seductively sharing a pack of Tim Tam\nfingers that he had summoned from out of thin air. Just as things are about to head\ntowards the early stages of foreplay between the pair they are suddenly\ninterrupted by the girl\u2019s livid ex-boyfriend (who was most likely banished in\nan earlier ad that I might have missed), who returns home dressed in full\nSiberian gear after having spent the last year or so exiled in Vladivostok. Finding\nhis now-ex being flirty with the magician (who, in this ad, resembles a young\nDavid Haye), he sarcastically tells her (or rather, shouts at her) that\nVladivostok was a blast and then, upon spotting the Tim Tam fingers, takes one\nand angrily bites into it while asking, \u2018So what is going on here? And since\nwhen did Tim Tams come in fingers!?\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

My young, dumb self might have been too na\u00efve to catch onto\nthe sexual connotations in those ads back then but I still remember them today.\nWell played, y\u2019all. Well played!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another ad that I remember is a commercial for Rolos chocolates that circulated on the screens in 1995. The first half of the commercial is set in bygone years (probably the 1960\u2019s) and in it, a young boy is taking a stroll through a zoo while chomping on some Rolos when he spots an elephant calf following its mother as they wander about in their enclosure. With a mischievous twinkle in his eye he approaches the enclosure and tempts the calf by holding out one of the chocolates. Just as the calf is about to take it into its trunk the boy suddenly shoves it into his mouth before taunting the dejected calf.
The second half projects to the present day. The boy, now a man, is watching a circus street parade while chewing on Rolos when he feels a tap on his shoulder. Upon turning his head a massive elephant\u2019s trunk swats him across the face, comically knocking him to the ground dazed and confused. The elephant, an adult version of the calf that he had taunted many years before, mockingly roars in his direction before marching on with the rest of the parade.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The tagline for that ad? \u2018Rolos\u2026.too good to share.\u2019 Bravo,\nmessage received and many laughs had. Extra points, too, for playing on the \u2018elephants\nnever forget\u2019 saying.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The third ad was one for Heinz baked beans from 1996. In it, a teenager and his younger brother are home alone for the night and the older brother is preparing a late afternoon snack for them both while also chatting on the phone to his girlfriend (side note: he was talking to her through a chordless landline, not a cellphone. It was the 1990s and so cellphones were still reserved for professionals and rich folks). As he is speaking his brother is sitting on the dining table, bored out of his mind to the point where he thinks that his brother is speaking to him. <\/em>
Big Brother tells his girlfriend, \u201cI was thinking of making something special for dinner tonight.\u201d
Little Brother, believing that Big Brother was addressing him, responds with, \u201cCool, what is it?\u201d
Big Brother then places a bowl of baked beans with sausages on the table. An excited Little Brother exclaims, \u201cHeinz Baked Beans with sausages? How special is that!?\u201d
Big brother continues to talk on the phone as he places a bowl of baked beans with meatballs on the table. Little Brother\u2019s eyes light up even brighter.
\u201cHeinz Baked Beans with meatballs too!? Um, which one is mine?\u201d
Big Brother, on the phone with his girlfriend, tells her, \u201cOh I don\u2019t mind we can share.\u201d
Little Brother, still thinking that his brother is addressing him, asks \u201ccan I have both of them?\u201d
Big Brother, on the phone, responds to a random question from his girlfriend with \u201cUm, YEP, SURE THING!\u201d
That was all that Little Brother needed to hear. He begins eating from both bowls as his brother wraps up the phone conversation. Big Brother then snatches one of the bowls from Little Brother and angrily asks, \u201cWhat are you doing, you pig!?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Absolutely hilarious!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And I feel hungry for a bowl of beans every time I watch it,\ntoo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The fourth and final ad is for McDonalds that I recall from my high school years, in the years 2000 or 2001. In it, Ronald McDonald is a participant in a karate class with a group of children and the Sensei presents him with three tests; the first is to break a board, which he accomplishes by flying towards the board as though he is going to kick it but instead flicking it in half with his finger. The next is to \u2018crack the code\u2019, which involved rearranging magnetic letters on a whiteboard to spell \u2018McDonalds,\u2019 and then finally to crack some walnuts which he accomplishes by picking up the nuts with nutcrackers in each hand and wielding them around while whooping and hollering as though he were Bruce Lee playing with nunchucks before cracking the walnuts open.
Yeah, that one always had me in stitches but I did also wonder how Ronnie could have scored a pass when he clearly cheated on the last test. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Me thinks Sensei is\nrunning a McDojo.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

There were many other ads that I remember fondly other than the four I\u2019d mentioned, a list of \u2018honorable mentions\u2019 if you will. Decore shampoo and conditioner and The Good Guys sampled the hit songs \u2018YMCA\u2019 and \u2018Good Vibrations\u2019, respectively, for their TV ads back in the day. Austalian Bananas came up with a catchy tune that promoted the golden fruit as \u2018Making Bodies Sing\u2019. Yellow Pages added the catchphrase \u2018Not HAPPY, JAN\u2019 into the Australian vernacular. The ad for M&M\u2019s have evolved from involving a duo of anthrophomorphic Red and Yellow M&Ms trying to avoid being eaten by humans to the pair and their different colored friends still on the run from those monstrous humans, and after all these decades the ads for Aeroplane Jelly and Vegemite from way before my time, as well as their catchy songs, have not faded from the public\u2019s consciousness. Not all may remember the lyrics to the songs but ask just about any grown Australian adult (even from Generation Y) about the ad for Aeroplane Jelly or Vegemite and more often than not they will know exactly what you are referring to.
Such is the power of effective TV advertisements. When done correctly they not only effectively promote the product and grab people\u2019s attention but they can also become synonymous with the brand, withstand the test of time and even go all the way to reach iconic status. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s the way you\nbuild a lasting legacy, Kids.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Which brings us back to TV ads today and my earlier statements regarding a regression in quality is hammered hard into my ears whenever I see \u2013 or rather, hear \u2013 the TV ad for Allianz Car Insurance. To summarize, the ad informs their audience that their comprehensive car insurance will \u2018guarantee all authorized repairs.\u2019 The ad then shows a mechanic handing a woman back the keys to her vehicle, now fixed and restored to good-as-new. The mechanic happily informs her that she is \u2018good to go.\u2019
\u2018Looks great,\u2019 she responds.
That\u2019s when all hell breaks loose.
As he gives her back her keys, the mechanic breaks out into a long, drawn, irritating chorus of \u2018AAAAAAHHHHHHHH\u2026\u2026\u2019 and is soon joined by his fellow mechanics as though they were singing the opening notes of a Broadway musical. Shoot, even the damn dog in the calendar on the wall joins in.
Once everyone has shut the hell up the woman simply responds with \u2018thanks\u2019 before driving off satisfied.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why the long chorus of \u2018AAAAAHHHHH\u2026..\u2019 you ask? Well, it\u2019s\nbecause the tagline is that their satisfied customers will get that\n\u2018AAAAAAAAAAAAA\u2026.llianz feeling\u2019 and well, you can too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bullshit. The only\nreaction I get is \u201cAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH\u2026\u2026.SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nothing against the company but yeah, I\u2019m sorry, they lost me with that ad. When your commercials causes one to squirm uncomfortably on the spot as though they are listening to a long, drawn out recording of nails scratching on a blackboard you need to have a good look at yourselves. If they wanted to give that ad more pizazz they should have allowed that \u2018AAAAAAHHHHH\u2026..\u2019 to go somewhere beyond sheer infernal noise, maybe into a revised rendition of the opening number for \u2018OKLAHOMA\u2019 with lyrics that are geared towards Allianz and the services that they offer. They could have turned the mechanic\u2019s garage into a glittering stage with choreography and dance moves from the mechanics and the satisfied client thrown into the mix.
Hell, even that dog from the calendar could have come to life, leaped out from the wall and then ran around the set in circles. Everyone loves a good dog!<\/em>
The musical number can end with everyone in some sort of post-dance pose, a position everyone holds for about two seconds before the customer breaks character, thanks the mechanics before driving off. At this point the mechanics and staff are still posing and someone randomly asks \u201ccan we relax now?\u201d
\u201cOk, everyone, back to work\u201d someone responds from the back.
The mechanics then break their poses and resumes their normal duties, thus ending the ad.
THAT would have been a kick-ass advertisement. Cheesy as hell but still a lot more fun than the one that they have on air right now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ads like that always have me wondering at what point did the\ntrains run off the rails. I don\u2019t know about y\u2019all but to me, most TV ads today\nseem over-produced, at times over-acted and there is a lack of memorable\ntaglines and slogans. There has also been a decline in catchy songs, jingles\nand jokes (although the jingle for the Vodafone ad gets stuck in my head for\ndays whenever I hear it so there\u2019s an exception) and in the case of that\nAllianz ad, just too weird and irritating although I have to give them points\nfor being unforgettable in some way. I don\u2019t work in the advertising sector but\nI do know that how a customer reacts to advertisements is kind of a big deal\nand this is especially important for TV ads as they have a very wide reach and\nso are an effective way to draw more customers into a business, kind of like casting\na wide net out into the ocean to reel in more fish rather than just relying on boring\nold fishing lines. Even if you attract customers strictly because of the ads\nthat they watched on TV, well, that\u2019s still more money for the business,\nmission accomplished. You just need to not mess that shit up by following\nthrough with what you promised. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nobody likes a con artist.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You know, my mother used to babysit our family friends\u2019 children when my sister and I were young. What did she say in exasperation whenever they truly acted the fool?
\u201cI think you guys should stop eating too many bananas. It\u2019s making your body sing too much.”
Anyone that has seen the old commercial for Australian Bananas would know exactly what she was referring to and such a line only made them \u2013 plus my sister and I \u2013 laugh our heads off. If that\u2019s not effective marketing then I don\u2019t know what is.
Don\u2019t get me wrong, I am not suggesting that each and every recent TV advertisement sucks. There are some currently on the airwaves that are quite entertaining and three in particular stand out for me. The AAMI Insurance ad that involved a man, his girlfriend and best friend returning home from a concert only to find that thieves had made off with his beloved wall-mounted moose head always cracks me up. Those Compare The Market ads featuring Alexandr The Meerkat are usually quite hilarious even if Alexandr\u2019s Russian accent seems to fade more and more with each ad and that Dare Iced Coffee ad featuring a new father contemplating on naming his newborn son \u2018Callum Murray\u2019 before he comes to his senses thanks to the coffee has me giggling and shaking my head in disbelief. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why do I appreciate these ads? Well, to me they are beautifully acted, funny and had gimmicks to play off of. The protagonist in that AAMI ad was spot on with his facial expressions and reactions throughout, from when he was showing off the moose head to his friend, his wide-eyed shock upon his girlfriend informing him that they\u2019d been robbed all the way to his joyful, Christmas-came-early reaction when an AAMI Insurance spokeswoman shows up at the front door with a replacement moose head. It also helped that he resembled a shorter, chunkier version of Borat, further upping his standing in the \u2018funny-looking-dudes\u2019 stakes.
As for Compare The Market, a Russian meerkat as a mascot? Geez, that\u2019s random, who would have ever thought of that!? Combine that with his funny voice and a snappy script (although some of the ads are admittedly kinda corny) and you have an ad with some punch.
That Dare Iced Coffee ad was most likely a jab at celebrities that shamelessly give their children stupid names but also serves as a warning as to what can happen if one makes important decisions while their mind and focus are clouded (in this case, sleepwalking through the day and in dire need of a caffeine hit). The father in the ad (we\u2019ll call him \u2018Mr. Murray) thinks of several possible scenarios that can occur for his newborn son in the future with a name like \u2018Callum Murray\u2019, including one in which he is pulled over by the police for speeding and another in which his bride laughs in his face upon mentioning his name in her wedding vows. Somehow his mind never ventured towards the strange looks that poor Callum would have had to endure if he worked at a fish & chips shop. After taking a big gulp of the bottle of coffee in his hand Mr. Murray quickly wises up and chooses a more sensible name for his son.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Before closing I thought I\u2019d also throw in a couple more ads for good measure, one that did the rounds on TV about ten or so years ago for the Australian beer brand Carlton Draught and a more recent one for Cadbury chocolates (man, what is it with chocolate ads?). For the Carlton Draught ad, all I have to say are four little words; It\u2019s A Big Ad. Anyone that has seen that ad would know what I am talking about. Go ahead and type those words on YouTube you will find out why I thought it was memorable.
The Cadbury ad involved a young girl entering a corner stone while her single mother, who works long hours to make ends meet for them both, stands outside talking on her phone. This small, blue-eyed innocent little girl asks the rather gruff-looking man behind the counter for a block of chocolate and offers a single coin plus whatever small toys she happened to be carrying in her pockets as payment. The storeowner\u2019s face remains as emotionless as an Easter Island statue as he looks outside and spots the mother talking on her phone but somewhere underneath that layer of menace his heart melts and he accepts the girl\u2019s payment. She then happily runs outside and offers the chocolate to her mother as a birthday gift and they share a tender hug together as a smile finally breaks on the store owner\u2019s face as he watches proudly from behind his counter.
The ad\u2019s slogan? \u2018There\u2019s a glass and a half in everyone.\u2019
Man, talk about a real feel-good ad. That one always brings a smile on my face even when I\u2019m having a horrible day. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

At the end of the day, this is just one man\u2019s opinion and not everyone will agree. It’s cool, to each their own. But yeah, TV advertisements in general seem to have lost their way, at least compared to those from many years past. I say they should bring back the comedy, the musical numbers via song parodies if need be and of course, the catchy slogans. While there have been ads that were banned from the airwaves due to explicit content (I\u2019m looking at you, KFC) companies shouldn\u2019t be afraid to push boundaries like they did in the past (seriously, those Tim Tam ads were low-key dirty as fuck), nor should they be afraid to let their actors be as loud and quirky where applicable.
Be memorable in a good way. Make sure people remember what they saw and heard for a very long time.
Maybe if all of this happened with regularity then we\u2019ll get more ads that will be remembered long after they\u2019ve been aired. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
Ok, now I want some Tim Tams. Which one should I go for?<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I don\u2019t watch TV now as much as I did as a kid, during the years when The Simpsons was still the best damn show on the tube, Ross and Rachel were trying to wrap their heads around what being \u2018on a break\u2019 meant and Kenny was meeting his maker in a variety of truly … <\/p>\n

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