Category: Uncategorised

New Year came and went, then it was straight back to business,

Went by too quick, that holiday period, daily life prefers a peculiar brand of slowness,

Ten years-plus an outcast, cynical and jaded,

Middle-finger salute to society all but permanent but low-key wanting some type of connection,

Logged onto FB one night, found me an old friend, he was with me in the trenches during the warzone that was lunch and recess,

Both of us deemed nerds, copped our fair share for it,

Me more so than him, that once-cheery kid grew up the polar opposite,

Back to the present he accepted my friend request, DM’d me after a few days,

Hadn’t seen or heard from him since graduation, his circumstances changed in strange ways,

After a few days he spilled his guts, tales of woe and heartbreak,

Thought she was the one so he upped sticks for her, before she tore his heart out then hurled it into the incinerator,

This mind back then wouldn’t allow sympathy, he’s just paying the price of vulnerability,

Welcome to society, where so many are fucking slimy, to trust is an act of self-sabotage, really,

Why’s he even dumping onto me this shit? This type of info one would keep a secret,

How’s he trusting a homie after more than ten years of distance?

Been keeping it in for too long, the contents within bubbling, pressure busts pipes, sooner or later there’ll be an explosion,

Somehow found myself compelled to help, this must be what they call compassion,

Channelling my inner optimist long dormant before I got to replying,

Encouraged him to soldier on, do away with plans foolish and drastic,

His luck could turn in a minute, in the end it’ll be worth it,

Regurgitated every cliché used by every motivational speaker ever,

Somehow it worked, though, found that out a few short months later,

Sure enough he met someone, in the present he’s still with her,

Two little ones to cap it off glad his happy ending came along.

In return he turned me onto anime again, been some time since I’d watched a series,

Then came a new beginning, at Pops’ insistence and urgings,

Began a new discipline, nothing like others that I’d tried,

Boxed and wore a karate gi in the past, but this seemed to throw every rule through the glass,

Squared on, everything from the centre, hard striking forbidden,

A fresh challenge but one that I took on, kept at it going forward,  

Seemed to be the turning point, felt a metamorphosis of sorts,

Befriended some fellow practitioners, for the longest time didn’t feel awkward,

Holed in my fortress for so long but dared to believe that leopards can change their spots,

Have I found a home away from home? Some semblance of acceptance?

All signs pointed to that direction, slowly but surely toppled the fences.

Finally embarked on a mission for qualification for that role I’d long been coveting,

Several months of fun and lessons, not to mention further friendships,

Can’t say I was a natural, but I’ll say I did ok with it,

It was fun while it lasted, been done for a while but thankful for the experience,

Later reunited face to face with that old buddy, the catalyst for this trajectory,

Not much changed physically, other than he’s aged markedly,

Got to know his co-pilot and the rest of their crew,

Still running with ‘em to this day, counting ‘em in my inner circle too,

Had long felt stagnant at work but seemed to embrace it once more,

Positive vibes permeating all aspects, have I found some secret key to what they call happiness?

Christmas with the extended fam sure was a blast,

Trip to Kosciuszko the icing on the cake, thus ending a year full of blessings in its wake,

Been a great one, I have to say, one of the best I’d ever had,

Still look back on it wistfully but to have lived it once I’m still glad,

Began as a surly recluse, all but anti-social and pissed at the system,

Wasted a great deal of young adulthood for it, always playing victim,

Picking at scabs from long ago, would have healed sooner had I not kept on doing so,

The lone sufferer the man in the mirror, time to get moving, better late than never,

Many moons prior, the Mayans predicted this to be the end,

For yours truly such was the case in some ways, finally emerged from a long hibernation,

Out from the darkness of the shadows to the brighter lights, it was a glorious reunion,

Old self has finally come to pass, in its place an older, wiser and all-round better version.

She was out for a walk, alone with her thoughts,

Five years retired already, been quite the journey, two years a widow now, unfortunately,

Heard from the kids every now and then, grandkids loved her when they visited,

Too long between reunions but life gets busy thanks to higher costs of living,

Melancholy comes knocking every now and then, but for the most part life’s a breeze,

Simple living and optimism, both have been the key,

On this day, her peace ‘bout to be shattered in ways cringey than clear and present danger,

The dude ran towards her, gave her quite a fright, expecting a thug or purse-snatcher but he wasn’t that type,

He asked her how she was doing, if she was feeling blue,

Wrapped himself around her, minus her consent, before a response can come through,

“It’ll be alright,” said he, “you will be ok,”

“You looked like you needed cheering, have a lovely day,”

His mate stands not far away, phone pointed towards ‘em,

Soon to be uploaded into cyberspace without their subject’s permission,

Off they run feeling heroic while she’s left to pick up the pieces,

To say she’s weirded out and mortified would be an understatement.

Not too far away, dude on the sidewalk wasting,

Reviewing his current situation, the culmination of bad breaks and his own poor decisions,

Living off of others’ generosity and donations,

For the most part mere shrapnel but it’s better than nothing,

One day was approached by a total stranger, cash in her hand, ready for a big contribution, but for reasons rather sad,

She dropped the dough as intended but her phone was pointed at his face,

“Enjoy your money, Sir,” said she, “hope you have a lovely day,”

He’ll be eating well tonight while making the rounds online,

Without his knowledge or consent, her generosity was tainted,

Helping the needy is cool, but social media clout’s her main objective,

Chasing praises from the masses, the dopamine fix is highly addictive,

But for every five likes there are far more of the opposite, consider the plan backfired,

Critics are letting her have it, she still doesn’t know it, but she’ll find out in a little while.

Good deeds with hidden motives, we’re seeing ‘em more often

Helping the downtrodden but we see you acting the paparazzi on ‘em,

It’s an empty gesture if you’re just doing it for clout,

Your audience ain’t cheering or admiring, they’re mocking and laughing out loud,

If you did it out of kindness then you wouldn’t need any witnesses,

You’re just fishing for compliments and backslaps from friends and so-called followers,

Putting it on blast reeks of fakeness and arrogance, how translucent can you get?

Using the less fortunate for your own selfish intentions? You’re a special breed of scum bucket,

And in other cases you’re just playing the space invader, running up on ‘em like whatever,

How’d you like it if you were hassled for no apparent reason? You’d think they were a right little nuisance,

Better cut that out sooner rather than later, you’re doing yourself no favors,

You’re considered a major irritant across social media, how does that label work for ya?

Indulge your ego elsewhere through different means, your actions aren’t appreciated here,

Better you walked on by than using and abusing ‘em, let the real altruists tend to them.

Act 1

It’s night time across the city, midnight rolling in a hurry,
On the base of a skyscraper, the tallest of its kind, a lone figure arrives,
The cape and full-body suit a smooth, silky black, face shielded by a similarly-coloured mask,
Anonymity is key, gotta hide that identity from the pesky powers that be,
Twice a week without fail, come sunshine and rain, been at it for some time now, the nerves won’t even attack now,
A small crowd gathers, where once they’d resembled a mosh pit,
One too many reruns later many had seen enough but for some the act remained hot stuff,
The one they’d come to see prepares, undergoes a vigorous warm-up routine,
The act will be over within seconds, such preparation seems extreme,
But tonight’s a treat for the fans, the ones that had stuck around through thick and thin,
For this is the last show, a retirement party of sorts, a fond farewell and a well-earned reward,
Limbs loose and ready, body warm and primed for the main event,
Approached the base of the building, five breaths deep breathing,
Then it was blast off, scurrying up that structure sleek as a panther,
Much to the awe of onlookers, still thrilled at this daredevil’s superpowers,
No special gloves and shoes or harnesses here, just literally scaling the windows and walls,
Looking skyward all the way, unbothered by the altitude at all,
Hit the rooftop in less than two, shimmied up the antenna too,
Now at the city’s highest peak, the view was grand and majestic,
Eerie silence up near the clouds, the hustle and bustle of the world below rendered silent and resembling a stream of lights and fire ants aglow,
It was time for the second part, the death defying one,
Better make it memorable, it’ll be the final one,
Strength gathered, dexterity and balance takes over, hand standing atop that antenna now, toes pointed upwards like a dancer,
Then without warning pushes off the perch, a somersault preceding a free-fall towards the gutter,
Audience holds its breath though they know how it ends, a wrong move still guarantees certain death,
Their hero’s right foot makes contact with the building’s wall once past the twentieth floor,
Sliding down all the way as though on vertical ice skates preventing a less desirable fate,
Touched down back to the starting point, the short show is complete,
The audience breaks into their final applause, the eyes of some welling with tears.
Not much emotion from the star, from behind the mask the eyes remain unchanged,
‘That’s it, I’m done,’ the voice utters in a near-whisper, walking away from the scene forever.

Act 2

It’s half-past-five, so ends another day of hard grind,
He ambles out his building, head down, headed towards the train station,
Air pods locked in, blasting some tune articulating loneliness and depression,
Somehow without being corny, extra gold stars for the musical artist,
He drifts away from the land of tall buildings, inching towards a main road,
Lining up the sidewalk, various cafes and convenience stores,
Outside one of which, a small group of men are loitering,
Smoking ciggies, clinking various energy drinks, warming up for a night of partying,
He sees them up ahead, from behind his sunglasses the eyes widen,
More than a few of ‘em look familiar, the realisation hits like a hook from Tyson,
Transported back in time, to when he was young, insecure and nervous,
Courtesy of the chumps from up ahead, day by day they were terrorising,
Not much in the way of beatings, thankfully, though they sometimes rained bombs,
Mostly through picking on and hazing, wounds psychological hurt just as much as physical,
Felt that juvenile urge to turn tail and split but quickly he catches his grip,
Been more than twenty since they’d clapped eyes on one another, surely they would’ve totally forgotten,
He stands up tall and proud, adjusts his shades then begins his trek,
Soon he’ll be scot-free, just need to casually stroll past ‘em,
He inches closer, their voices and laughter grow louder, one of them catches his eye,
He returns the gaze behind his shades, as though burning holes into this guy,
His hostility goes undetected by the target, soon he’s walked past them,
On and on he walks as they continue their little talks,
Their voices fade behind him, now lost among the sound of the streets,
“Some class reunion that was,” says he, the station visible in the distance.

Act 3

Lunchtime almost over, time to head back to the building,
Knock off the last three hours before home time comes knocking,
Had gone outdoors to unwind, at a park nearby, passed some establishments on the way back, that’s when he caught my eye,
Enjoying his own mid-day meal, seated outdoors by the sidewalk, playing with his phone while all but oblivious to the world,
Hadn’t seen him for quite some time, figured we could chat for a while,
“Hey, Bro, how’re you doing?” the greeting roused him from cyberspace, immediately he stood then we shared a brotherly embrace,
“Been a long time,” said he, “how’s things with you?”
From there chopped it up in a hurry, his precious break was almost over, too,
Asked him if he was still going to the club, a shared space of ours,
He said it’s been a while before dropping a mini bombshell on us,
“I’m thinking about quitting,” he said, “what about you? Are you still going?”
But before I could respond the world started spinning,
My boy vanished without a trace, as did the setting we were standing in,
Until it was straight-up noir like many an Instagram post in mid-2020,
Followed by a buzzing sound, a white light suddenly greeted me…

The Next Morning

The phone alarm was squealing, it was morning already,
Yawning as I sat upright, pondering the meaning behind that dream from last night,
Three unrelated tales, each with differing points of view,
Finding myself stumped for answers, well, what say you?

Sit down, close your eyes, take a trip down Memory Lane,

From the rubble, what did you mine that made those eyes rain?

No doubt it was fun times of endless cheer and sunshine,

The world stood still for all the right reasons, the glow perpetuating across the four seasons,

Seems so far away, in its place endless bouts of boredom and apathy, dotted by depression and anxiety,

Recapturing what you once had proving to be mission impossible, they say keep going but in your mind you seem unable,

You rage at the unfairness, at feeling empty and cheated,

The passing of time claimed another, got you yearning for reasons to keep going.

Everything is temporary, one of life’s little tragedies,

Often revealed the hard way, what we have can and will fade,

Livelihoods and possessions, good times and the people in it,

Our very lives, too, while we’re at it, losses happen at any given moment,

But there remains two seemingly endless constants, though you might not want to hear ‘em,

That of change and suffering, both often come together,

Even while the world sparkles some form of pain is lurking,

Think about the stresses that come with planning for events that’ll have your crew buzzing,

Might seem like child’s play compared to the lot forced onto others but surely could tempt one to scrap plans for something different,

The game of love’s a beautiful thing but can’t play without risking hurt and heartbreak,

No telling how long, or if you’ll ever, find that special soulmate,

And if you do then further challenges await, bound to leave you drained,

Exchanging ‘I do’s’ then raising children, neither are straightforward,

From the legal wrangling to fixing up assets before having and raising successful children,

Big life changes for the fortunate but come with their own sets of hurdles,

Cheers to you if you find your life’s purpose but the road to success ain’t smooth,

Guaranteed there’ll be sticks and stones to stumble over with every next move,

Might be forced to up sticks, so to speak, running in place gets you nowhere,

Defy what you obey to the point of dogma, almost certainly requires an upgrade of your character,   

Peaks and valleys that may break one’s soul, might convince you it ain’t worth it after all,

But quitting’s never rewarded, where there’s passion there’s another direction,

Go with the flow and keep your eyes on the prize, you’re a lot more resilient than you’d ever realised.

Time waits for no one, camp for too long you’ll be left behind,

Changes happen unannounced, sadly at the expense of those golden times,

Now it makes sense, why many try to extend the moment,

While fear paralyses others, they’re missing opportunities in the process,

But moments won’t last, soon you’ll lose your grip, better decide now, Friend, which one is it,

Find what’s worth suffering for, ain’t about dopamine fixes anymore,

Ignore your cravings for a minute, happiness is but a limited source,

Focus on what you’ll fight for over and over, for better or for worse,

In the end that’s what it boils down to, suffering for your art and passion,

A reflection on life’s brutal truth, spots of happiness dotting over endless suffering,

Actors and athletes, artists and authors, frontliners, teachers and even your friendly nine-to-fiver,

See ‘em bleeding, sweating, grinding to to be the best in their field, shit is painful but awe-inspiring,

And when the world turns they adjust accordingly, no time to cry about what’s beyond control,

They who quit and go home weren’t worthy, gotta fight to achieve total victory,

They say change is good but it’s never easy, what you love now might have to be confined into history,

Evolve or die, Friend, accept the brutal truth over comforting lies,

Only the strong survive, something to ponder over along the journey,

It don’t stop ‘til the casket drops, Tupac nailed it quite succinctly.

It’s an average day, you’re just chilling with the homies,

Smoked some blunts, chugged some beers, nothing out the ordinary,

Conversations random, whatever a mind impaired can conjure up,

Adversarial situations were somehow brought up,

That’s when you piped up, on your feet and head up proud

Like a silverback gorilla, practically thumping that chest out loud,

‘Nothing can bring me down,’ says you ‘I’ll take on all comers,’

‘Any snag I’ll get out of it, any challenge I’ll overcome ‘em,’

‘That’s my mentality, Fools, I’m always ready,’

‘Bring ‘em all on, give me your worst, I’m here come and get me!”

On one fine day the universe complied, that diagnosis struck you like lightning,

So much for your tough talk, the sickness knocked you down and squirming,

Forced you to dig deep, many times had your hand on the white towel,

Ready to throw it in before that will to win granted that second wind,

Bet you didn’t see it coming, did ya? Took you completely unawares,

Got more than you bargained for though you claimed to be prepared.

Iron Mike was right, everyone got a plan until they get punched,

Same can be said of expectations and reality, life won’t always play fairly,

They say true selves emerge during tough times, easy to boast while the sun shines,

To blow smoke up your ass while blue skies hover above green grass,

To write a script where you call the shots, but plans go awry more often than not,

Is it fight or flight should the shit hit the lights? Let’s see how you’ll respond,

Nothing wrong with expectations, self-confidence is an asset,

Such a mindset will always breed a winner,

So long as it’s within reason, life won’t always bend to your will,

It can be your ally or an antagonist, teaching you valuable lessons in the midst of it,

Exposing where you’re right and what needs more work,

Don’t be scared to fail or to get that ass broke, use it as a means for new growth,

So heed the moral lesson, Son, believe in yourself but don’t fall for your own hype,

Losses can and will happen, you my friend are no different,

Better to keep both feet on the ground, they that live in the clouds have further to fall should the winds blow their safety net, fear not, young warrior, there’s hope for you yet.