Author: musical

There you go, hitting another milestone,

From rocking and rolling then crawling, now you’re levelling up to walking,

Previously done under supervision, guided by Ma or Pa’s hands or some wheelie contraption,

Time to try it unassisted, took five steps before tripping, dusted yourself off before continuing, gotta keep the momentum going,

That tiny body packed with determination and perseverance, sadly both may fade with age,

You see, Kiddo, some grow up mastering the art of quitting, giving in to fear and useless opinions,

How the hell does it happen? Sure is mind-boggling,

Not lumping ‘em all in the same box, but it gets them, seemingly, more often than not,

Not trying to scare ya, Kid, you’re still too young to get any of this,

But as long as we’re here might as well give it to you straight before you go on with the rest of your day.

Here’s you; just over a year old, still travelling through life’s early morning,

But peep at those four or five years older than you wishing they were bigger,

Grown-ups have all the freedom, they’re thinking, no bedtimes, schoolwork or pushy parents,

But the future will say otherwise, when you yourself are older you’ll realize,

Youthful fantasies turning out to be fallacies, now you’re dealing with real responsibilities,

Least of all your actions, the ripple effects could mean the difference between peace and catastrophe,

You’ll have learned to deal with scrapes to the knee, it’ll be a flesh wound, literally, compared to life’s other maladies,

Think that being the runt in the litter is a downer? Grown-ups definitely have it rougher,

Choices could mean life or death, ain’t nobody coming to save you from them, either,

Truth is, that once unquenchable curiosity could be blunted, as is that once mighty sense of adventure

For now your peers fear monsters hiding under the bed, later on the voices of doubt within their heads,

Where they were once carefree they’re more aware of their surroundings which could act as breeding grounds for overthinking, got ‘em skittish like creatures looking out for predators,

Even others’ opinions become serious business, never was a barrier between others among youngsters,

But in the grown world they’re using ‘em as weapons of mass destruction, of hazing and other methods potentially dangerous,

While the kiddies a few years ahead of you are pretending to be superheroes and all-conquering beings, their parents’ peers are ramping up the narcissism or giving in to insecurities,

Even the act of selfie-taking a whole new battleground, filters needed to gain some sort of advantage,

Social media a curse and a blessing, depending on how you use it,

Always cognizant of others, looking for strengths and weaknesses, for some it dictates their every movement when they should be staying in their lane and minding their own business,

So they end up moving cautiously, the fear of losing got them chained,

Growing up doesn’t equal total freedom, they get misty-eyed recalling their early years for a reason.

Just some thoughts that came to mind, watching you try and try again,

Setbacks inconsequential, keeping at it until you’ve mastered it, moving on if it’s mission impossible,

No tears from those eyes when it’s the latter unless you scrape a limb, time to find another option, conquer new worlds while you’re at it, it really is that simple,

Contrast that to Mom and Pops’ peers, too many of them throw in the towel too easily,

Don’t come at the writer, Folks, not all are under the same brolly,

But is it not uncommon to watch one fold by way of rage-quitting?

Whether it’s some personal project gone awry or even their own relationships?

Sure, they’re bigger, stronger and smarter but are they really braver?

You might think so since they can handle scenarios that have you hollering but in the face of failure, the unknown, their own image and others’ opinions they’re more or less cowering,

But what you and your fellow kiddos need to realize is that time, once an ally, has become an adversary,

The further along the journey, you see, the greater the knowledge of one’s immortality, some feel empowered while others feel expendable,

One false move can end it all, literally and figuratively,

Some outcomes reversible but in other situations game over,

That’s why they proceed with caution, can’t blame youth on reckless decisions,

Mom and Pops aren’t around no more to rescue them, what happens next is all up to them,

But it really shouldn’t stop ‘em from living,

From trying new things, taking up new hobbies, meeting others dancing to a different tune, maybe shoot for the stars, the sky and the moon,

Can’t jump off the pier without first assessing the depth of that water,

But waiting for too long has its costs, time squandered is time forever lost.

You need not worry about that for a while, still getting to know the world around you with a smile,

But as you get older please don’t neglect your inner child,

The pluck you’re displaying now, trying to take your steps,

Hope you hold onto it for life, use it to overcome life’s many tests,

Whatever it is you aim for, chase after it with all your might,

Success may prove elusive but if it matters you will keep up the fight,

In a few short years you might join your older peers wishing they were bigger,

To be too cool for school and rules, no one can tell them where to go and what to do,

Before you know it you’ll be there, too, one of the grown-ups you once looked up to,

The next generation are where you were at, make sure you keep those youthful fantasies intact,

Live life to the full, be bold and take chances, never mind others’ opinions, to hell with the haters, why concern yourself with the languishing and envious?

Keep trying or find something else, keep it simple, be good and soldier on forward,

They say life’s a rollercoaster, full of twists and turns,

Ride it for as long as you can, got plenty of years to burn,

Seeing that ever-smiling face of yours, only looking forward to the future,

Take it with you, Kid, never stop believing there’s always good around the corner.

Chalice in hand, held by unsteady fingers,

Contents bubbling, smell is sickening, guaranteed to make a killing,

Tipped then forced down your gullet, by your hand at your command,

Down goes the poison and now your insides are corroded,

Yet you’re sitting, waiting, for they that vexed you to meet their maker,

Though you’re the one that swallowed it, the world around you quickly fading,

The script been flipped, they were supposed to take the punishment,

Should’ve listened to Buddha in matters of holding onto anger,

You think you’ve got ‘em poisoned but in the end it’s you that ends up suffering,

Bearing that weight to spite and remind them that they are bottom-feeding, no-good, foul little cretins while those joints of yours are straining,

To hell with lifting your feet up, you’re thinking, keep it pressed against their necks,

Choke the life out of ‘em, metaphorically, make sure they never forget,

Do tell, Dear Friend, why hold onto wounds from the past?

How do you expect to heal when you keep picking at the scabs?

You think they’re fretting over sins? They’ve likely moved on from that shit,

Forged new lives, perhaps redeemed themselves, it’s been and done and buried deep,

Maybe they never cared, if your description of them’s accurate then they must be sociopathic,

Those types never give a thought to the chaos they create, they’re a special breed indeed,

Why not go another direction? Turn that anger into kindness?

Forgive then let go instead, finally, belatedly, take your foot off their necks.

You’re likely aghast, wondering why show them any mercy? It’s akin to condoning what they did, miss you with that shit,

You’ve got it wrong, though, no one’s asking you to let it slide,

But are such folks worth the effort required to carry hatred with you all your life?

You got to this point intact but choose to stay mad at ‘em,

You’re not hurting ‘em or beating ‘em, if anything just empowering ‘em by choosing to stay their victim,

Forgive them, Friend, drop the load and catch your breath,

Your time on earth is limited, why waste it caught up in these feelings?

Gotta keep your eyes on the road, the only way is forward,

Can’t look at the rearview for too long ‘lest you get into an accident,

So go ahead, let them go and set yourself free,

Life will be so much better, you’ll see.

Been here before, numerous times, at this point lost count,

Call it a speed bump, call it a trap, length of time spent here vary across the map,

The bane of many a writer, y’all know what it’s all about,

Once again traipsin’ around The Block, driven berserk by the ticking of the clock,

Charged out the gates armed with ideas, stacks of lines and chapters waiting to be written,

On a roll of sorts before Humpty Dumpty had a fall, just can’t make sense of it at all,

Reviewing the battle plan once more, looking for different avenues to cross, hopefully to then piece it all together, to make art from out the rubble,

Alas, it’s no use, dead ends in all directions, no telling how long we’re stuck,

Escape will take patience and, perhaps, a heavy dose of luck,

Thus opens a new fork in the road, no turning back from either option,

To wave the proverbial flag and walk or to grit those teeth and soldier on,

Really comes down to your dedication with this art that you’re creating,

Got something important to say? Maybe bills to pay?

Maybe you’re just passing time through creating, normal life will go unaffected,

If real life depends on it, if the message is worth spreading you’ll find a way to push through,

Been here before, why stop now? Think back to why you’d started, the cliché rings true,

If not then drop it, walk away then begin anew, maybe come back to it later, once time and wisdom brought about with it some answers,

Find a way or an excuse, the rest is up to you,

How bad do you want it? Will you leave or stay stuck in this place? Rise above or be consumed by it? Find a way or walk away? Better ask yourself some questions.

Chapter three, we’ve finally made it, the final level inching closer towards completion,

Barely holding onto that proverbial rope, it’s cracked and fraying while palms are bleeding,

Prepping for that final boss, taking care of its minions first,

Trials, assessments and exams galore, a carefree life exists no more,

Outside those gates, learning the inner workings behind the driver’s seat,

Been at it for one year already, locked on towards those red Ps,

Life at home base remains stable, though chipping on the surface,

Unsure if it’s wear and tear or a slow-paced crumbling,

Tensions mounting, taking a wee bit longer to resolve, at times those glory years feel like mere hallucinations, might as well had never happened at all,

Can’t forget that day, another explosive row between them three, retreated to the sanctuary, teens shed tears only under the veil of privacy,

Feeling the heat from some of the relos, nothing like pressure to create diamonds,

It also busts pipes, bet they didn’t know it, that’s how your guy here be feeling it,

There’s also the retreat, lasted two days and one night in an idyllic setting to ‘find ourselves’, that’s the bullshit they’re preaching,

Didn’t quite go as planned, yours truly got a revelation instead, any semblance of acceptance pretty much gone and fucking dead,

Couldn’t even shower in peace, the trolls were frothing and let loose,

No deadly kinky prison shit in here, but literal mudslinging was put to malicious use,

Way to convince a guy that he’s alone, fuck it, so be it,

Won’t rattle y’alls cages anymore, I’ll gladly go off on my lonesome,

Can’t lie, some friendly folks remained, well-meaning and approachable, unlike the snakes that went right for the jugular,

Treated them in kind but stopped short of letting them in, never know if wolves are lurking within, gotta be wary of whom I be trustin’,

Don’t bother asking ‘bout girls, dating or anything of the sort, no time for any of that, not while tests, gen pop and expectations are on riding my back,

Not that they’re checking for your boy and the feeling was mutual, at this rate will probably fly the skies without a co-pilot, off to the great unknown alone,

Every waking moment between classes spent in the library, a refuge from the bullies and the politics,

Finding a safe haven between shelves, can’t remember the categories but one of them was music,

Flicking through pages until the chiming of the bell, before another onslaught of assessments and unwanted interactions, life on campus a special kind of hell,

Speaking of, they say there’s a place reserved for those that take matters into their own hands,

Never did plan on turning towards a permanent solution, but to say I ain’t ever thought about it would be lyin’ about it.

Took a trip down memory lane one day, flicking through that photo album,

So many fond memories, some of ‘em forgotten,

Stumbled upon one from kindergarten years, featured two cute little kids,

One of ‘em yours truly, you being the other, ain’t seen you in years and years,

How we came to share a snap, kind of a funny story, that,

Never were buddies, nor did we interact, boys and girls tend to stick to their own, just a matter of fact,

Parents’ Day was the catalyst, school putting together a celebration, kiddies dancing with one another, that’s how we wound up partners,

Recollections of that day hazy, been more than thirty, feels like a lifetime,

So many highs and lows since, it lies buried deep beneath layers of grime,

This artefact remains the only proof of its occurrence and also our shared existence,

Which, by that time, had become numbered, year’s end brought with it drastic changes,

Both of us destined to leave The Islands, this boy and his fam first cab off the ranks,

Bound for the Land Down Under, a better life lay ahead, so promised the parents,

Heard from the grapevine that you and your folks were bound for the Land Of Opportunity, traveling to opposite sides of the globe,

Never crossed paths again, our time in one anothers’ stories ended,

Can’t lie, looking at this picture kinda makes me wonder where you’re at,

If you yourself possess a keepsake, also how life had turned out for you,

Are you still up there in the States? Maybe moved overseas? Maybe returned to the Philippines?

Married and had you a bunch of kids? Flying solo like many today are wont to do? Wherever you are, hope it all worked out well for you,

Maybe we’d crossed paths by accident over the years, this kid grew up to be quite a traveller, maybe you’d taken a similar path, it’s just one of many possibilities,

But at the end of the day it’s all speculation, don’t get me wrong, I ain’t simping or wishing and hoping,

We were six at the time, too early to be thinking about romance, barely even got to talking, though the classmates did their share of trolling,

About how we’d grow old together, apparently dance partners make good life partners,

Despite the lack of an emotional connection or signs of affection holding hands is enough for a happily ever after,

I wonder if you remember that or even noticed, kinda amusing now just thinking about it,

Kids say the darndest things, always jumping straight to conclusions,

Just to let you know, I’m doing alright, got up to this point mostly intact, been some challenges along the way but everyone goes through that,

Taking it all one step at a time, it’s really the best that we can do, take your time, pay others no mind, it’s your own path, how it goes only you determine that,

Anyway, just the musings of a man taking a trip back in time, come to think of it, what do you suppose our fellow peers are up to?

Just something to reflect over during whatever downtime we can spare, which, in adulthood, is just so damn rare.